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The first album I bought all by myself was DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince’s He’s the DJ, I’m the Rapper.

I got a portable tape player and some cash for my 13th birthday so I stood there in (one of) the mall’s record stores and looked for a very specific album. That album wasn’t He’s the DJ, I’m the Rapper but that was on my list and the stupid record store didn’t have the one I was actually looking for so buy default, He’s the DJ, I’m the Rapper was the first tape I ever paid for on my own.

Years later when the topic of “what was the first album you ever bought” came up and it was my turn to share, I lied and said that it was INXS’ Listen Like Thieves. That was the tape I was looking for when I bought He’s the DJ, I’m the Rapper. Listen Like Theives ended up being the second album I purchased after seeking it out at another record store in the mall.

As a quick digression, wasn’t it great when there were record stores in the mall? And I don’t mean a record store, I mean record stores. As in plural. Those were the days. Back before computers came along and fucking ruined everything.

Why did I lie? Well, that’s easy. I was embarrassed. At the point in my life when I was lying about my first album I was into Glam Rock. Telling my fellow Glam Rock listeners that I bought He’s The DJ, I’m the Rapper willingly would immediately ostracize me. In Junior High you need all the friends you can get and all the friends I could get were the ones who would mock me for my first music purchase if they found out it was a silly rap album. But those guys were dumb. Seriously dumb. I know that now, but back then it was hard to tell the dumb people from the not dumb people.

The first CD I ever bought was Rush’s Presto. But this isn’t about my first CD purchase, it’s about my first ever music purchase and being ashamed of it, if only for a couple years.

By the time I was in college I had pretty much figured out who I was. I was the person who bought He’s the DJ, I’m the Rapper as their first musical purchase. I was the person that listened to whatever sounded good, regardless of what anyone else thought. I embraced that and moved on with my life.

And that’s how it should be. Music is personal. Who gives a shit what you listen to as long as you enjoy it. Besides, there are far more important things to be ashamed about… like your continued belief that those biker shorts still fit.